Stress Reducer Blog

Have you noticed how stress, anxiety and fear have gone viral? 

Yes, I know you have, but that doesn’t mean you have to catch it. 

In addition to a real live financial crisis, we are being fed a steady diet of doom and gloom that keeps magnifying the problem. It’s something akin to sitting in an echo chamber where all you hear is “Be afraid, be very afraid” over and over and over again.

It’s not good for the nervous system. It’s not good for anyone’s physical health. And it doesn’t do much for our emotional lives as well.

The worst part is that when we are overwhelmed by stress, anxiety and fear, we don’t think clearly. That means that we are less able to make good choices in the face of real life problems.

Mastering stress, anxiety and fear is what the Stress Reducer Blog is all about. That doesn’t mean beating it into submission. It does mean taking steps to diminish it’s effects so you can make good decisions for you and your family. 

I know lots about stress, anxiety and fear, but I communicate it best in dialogue. So let me know what’s on your mind. Let me know what you need right now to reduce your level of stress and meet the current challenges in your life. I would love to hear from you, and I would love to help.

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Clearly this reporter doesn’t grasp what mindfulness really is…being present to whatever is going on, not pushing stuff to the side. Yikes!

Other than that, however, the article is quite good and makes a good case for meditation in general and mindfulness meditation specifically when it comes to stopping anxiety and reducing stress.

Read more of ‘Mindfulness therapy pushes the bad thoughts to one side‘.

Want to learn more about mindfulness meditation, get Jon Kabat-Zinn’s Full Catastrophe Living

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How are you on this fine day in October? The sun is finally coming out here in southern New England.

Recently I’ve been thinking about anxiety and stress. Well I’m always thinking about it, and therein lies the problem for many of us who are feeling stressed, overwhelmed and anxious.

To stop anxiety and stress, one of the most effective things you can do is stop thinking and start doing.

Here’s the cycle as I see it…something happens or we’re afraid of something happening and that triggers anxiety and stress.

Rather than immediately kicking into fight or flight we take a middle road…paralysis. Just like a rabbit caught in the headlights, we freeze.

In that state all we can do is ruminate about whatever it is that triggered our reaction in the first place…and we spin around and around in it. The more we think about it the more the anxiety and stress escalates. Sound familiar?

It is imperative to break the cycle, and the best way I know is to take action. In my experience it doesn’t even really matter if it’s the best action. What matters is that we DO something.

So try this to stop anxiety and reduce stress…

1. Stop

2. Don’t try to talk yourself out of it (doesn’t work and it’s counterproductive).

3. Ask yourself what small step you could take to solve or prevent the problem that’s causing stress and anxiety.

It doesn’t have to be the full solution, just one small step in the direction of a solution.

If you don’t know what direction, just take your best shot because it really doesn’t matter. In my experience even the wrong action breaks the log jam of emotion, which in turn, frees us to think more clearly and take more effective action.

4. Do it. Take action. Take that one small step.

5. Then notice how you’re feeling. Better?

Hope that helps,

Susan

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Did you read the New York Times article, Understanding the Anxious Mind, yesterday? Pretty interesting, but was it helpful for the stressed among us?

One of the points I found particularly interesting was…

ANXIETY IS NOT fear, exactly, because fear is focused on something right in front of you, a real and objective danger. It is instead a kind of fear gone wild, a generalized sense of dread about something out there that seems menacing — but that in truth is not menacing, and may not even be out there. If you’re anxious, you find it difficult to talk yourself out of this foreboding; you become trapped in an endless loop of what-ifs.

Fear can be stressful but if we look at fear as a real response to real danger, it’s safe to say it is not a chronic condition because it passes once the danger passes.

Fear is a call to action. We need to respond in order to get out of a dangerous situation. What makes anxiety and stress so debilitating is how chronic they are. We are ‘flight or fight’ mode all the time. Yes it does go up and down, but for most of us, there is a constant undercurrent of anxiety and stress which over time is damaging to our emotional and physical health.

The article was actually quite hopeful in looking at how even with a temperamental inclination, environment can play a big role in mitigating the effects of temperament. That’s the good news. The bad news is that the research, as yet, does not show us the best way to stop anxiety in children who exhibit ‘high reactor’ tendencies. What they do say is this…

The best outcome, however it happens, is to rear a child who learns to wrestle his demons on his own. Some children figure out themselves what works best.

So what do you think? How can parents help their ‘high reactor’ children? Were you a ‘high reactor’ growing up? What helped you or hindered you in dealing with your temperament?

Please share your thoughts by leaving a comment.

Take care,

Susan

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Are we wired to worry? Current research as reported in today’s ‘New York Times Magazine’ would suggest that the causes of anxiety (as opposed to fear) are temperamental. The research also shows that temperament is not the whole story if you want to stop anxiety.

The tenuousness of modern life can make anyone feel overwrought. And in societal moments like the one we are in — thousands losing jobs and homes, our futures threatened by everything from diminishing retirement funds to global warming — it often feels as if ours is the Age of Anxiety. But some people, no matter how robust their stock portfolios or how healthy their children, are always mentally preparing for doom. They are just born worriers, their brains forever anticipating the dropping of some dreaded other shoe.

Read more of Understanding the Anxious Mind

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…now researchers have discovered that the sensation of being highly stressed can rewire the brain in ways that promote its sinister persistence….Happily, the stress-induced changes in behavior and brain appear to be reversible. Read More…

Certainly makes the case for taking a vacation…have you had one this summer?…and supports what I’ve said before about when you are stressed from feeling overwhelmed the best stress reducer is to stop.

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