Stress Reducer Blog

Yesterday I recommended watching comedies as a stress reducer.

Honestly I don’t know how people with no sense of humor survive. Life can be mighty hard at times. Cultivating a sense of humor in response can really lighten the load.

I’ll admit when times are tough, the humor can turn rather black but that’s the point after all. Find the humor and you alleviate the stress.

I know it’s easier said than done. When you’re feeling the most stress, it may feel impossible, but over time it can be cultivated.

Start here and see how it goes…

When you’re feeling stressed, take a breathe, then just step back for a moment and imagine your watching the situation as an outsider. With that perspective I’d bet there’s quite a lot you can see about the situation that’s humorous.

As wonderful example of turning parental stress into humor is this site…Growing Edges. I particularly like this story about the chocolate syrup and orange juice.

I do have to admit this is even funnier for me because this is my niece and nephew making such a mess and my sister trying to deal with it, but still I think it’s pretty funny and it’s a wonderful example of finding the humor under trying circumstances.

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When was the last time you had a good laugh? Or watched a funny movie?

Laugher is an essential part of our humanity. It contributes to our capacity to cope with life’s challenges. It gives us a respite from the doom and gloom that often surrounds us.

Norman Cousins closed himself in a hotel room and watched Marx Brothers movies for pain relief. Ten minutes of laughter for several hours of pain relief. Not bad eh?

In the early 1990’s I worked for hospice and during that time and for a good while after, I would only watch comedies. When life is that real, you don’t need fictionalized drama on top of it. Laughter was one of the things that allowed me to do the work without getting depressed, stressed and overwhelmed by the intense emotional pain I was dealing with on a daily basis. It allowed me to be present with an open heart to the families I met.

Now it doesn’t make all the stress disappear for good, but it does tend to lend some perspective and gives us a much needed break.

So go rent a funny movie and have a good laugh. You’ll feel better for it.

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In my last post, I talked about how staying in the present moment is a wonderful stress reducer. I have to admit it’s easier said than done, but there are 3 things that are helping me do it.

1. I am no longer listening to the repetitive fear mongering of the media. I have turned off the news and listen to no more than one news report a day. Sometimes I don’t listen to any, and you know what? I haven’t missed anything important.

2. I have meditated now for 25 years, and most meditation practice is about staying present in the moment, opening the heart and staying connected to source. Even 5 minutes of observing the breathe has a way of bringing you right back into the present moment.

3. I remind myself throughout the day that for today everything is fine. I will say that having Heidi here to remind me of that helps a lot, because for today she is fine.

What helps you stay in the present moment?

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Living in the present moment is a piece of ancient spiritual wisdom worth remembering in this discussion of uncertainty and lack of control.

Staying focused on the present is a massive stress reducer. For right now, at this moment, I am okay. For today, I have shelter, food, income, a loving family, good friends and a healthy dog.

Any of that could change tomorrow. That’s always been true, but in the normal course of most of our lives we choose to keep that awareness in the background. We don’t think about how it could all change in an instant. We expect continuity as we move into the future.

Currently we are living in a world of Chicken Littles…the sky is falling, the sky is falling…and it’s really hard to stay removed from all that catastrophizing.

I’m finding it as hard as anyone else, but I am also finding that the lesson of Heidi’s illness has been to remind me that for today she is fine and for today I am fine. And you know what? It’s enough. It’s actually more than enough to keep the stress monsters at bay.

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Recently I’ve been addressing uncertainty as a cause of stress…and it is, but it seems to me there’s also a component of feeling out of control that’s feeding the high levels of stress and anxiety.

In psychological terms it’s called locus of control. People with an internal locus of control experience themselves as being in control of their lives where as people with an external locus of control attribute their circumstances to factors outside of themselves.

It’s been well known for years that people with an internal locus of control tend to have much less stress than people with an external locus of control.

In our individualistic American culture, we tend to see people with that internal sense of control as being healthier, but how are they faring in the current economy?

Seems to me these might be the people having the hardest time of all.

What do you think?

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